Original Golden Retriever Life Is Like A Toilet Theres Always An Asshole Unisex T-shirt, Sweatshirt, Hoodie, Long Sleeve Tee
Premium DTG Printed Apparel – Made to Order
That feeling when someone stops you and says “yo, where’d you get that?” – that’s what this is. Premium Gildan® cotton, DTG-printed so the colors hit different and never fade. Your new go-to, trust us.
📸 The photo features a T-Shirt, but you’re not limited to that! This design is available on T-Shirt, Long Sleeve, Sweatshirt & Hoodie. Pick your style and we handle the rest.
The Good Stuff
- 🎨 Print That Pops – DTG-printed directly into the fabric. No cracking, no peeling – just bold, vivid color.
- 🧵 Feels Like a Hug – Gildan® fabric with OEKO-TEX certified dyes. Premium comfort from the inside out.
- 👕 All-Day Comfort – Classic fit with taped seams and a tear-away label. Zero itch, zero irritation.
- 🇺🇸 Good Cotton, Good Vibes – US Cotton Trust Protocol member. Sustainable, premium, American-grown.
Fabric Specs
- Tees & Long Sleeves: 5.3–6 oz, 100% US cotton – light enough for summer, layerable for fall.
- Fleece (Sweatshirt & Hoodie): 8 oz cotton/poly blend – warm, smooth surface, anti-pill finish.
- Fabric note – Sport Grey (90/10 cotton/poly) has a slight poly blend for that classic heather finish.
Your Perfect Match
Find your size and pick your color – it’s that easy:


- Find your color in the chart above.
- Match your measurements to the size guide.
- Add to cart and check out securely.
Shipping & Returns
- ✅ Made in: 1–3 business days.
- 📦 US Shipping: 3–7 business days.
- ⚡ Rush Delivery: 3–5 business days.
- 🌍 Worldwide: 1–2 weeks.
Every item is made to order just for you. Please verify your size using the chart above. We can’t accept returns for sizing errors, but we’re always here to help if something isn’t right.
🛒 Explore more designs at StateVibeTee.com – quality you can count on.